My Own Upbringing

 To summarize from the last post;

I talked about some key differences between the ways that parents raise their children academically in Eastern and Western culture. In my opinion, a mix of both cultures was what I thought would be the best way for students to grow in their academics. 

For me, it's hard to say that parents should raise their children a certain a way as I am not a parent. And I'm sure there are many reasons and motives behind the actions of parents on how they raise their children. 

Growing up here in America was a bit of a challenge for me. It's not that I was failing in my academics or I was socially ostracized by my peers. In fact, I got along with my peers very well! What was challenging was finding my identity; I had the option of either immersing myself in the culture and whims of the people around me or following the ideals and morals that my parents had taught me when I was younger. 

It was tough when I was in elementary to middle school. My weeks consisted of nonstop work and business, and it was difficult to find a free moment. While my friends were out playing outside with their friends, I was taking piano and saxophone lessons. While they celebrated birthday parties on the weekends, I was at Korean school. While they were relaxing on the weekends, I was constantly dragged along with my parents to church early on Sunday mornings. It was hard not to resent my parents for forcing me to engage in activities that I did not want to do. 

As I got older, I began to think about why my parents "forced" me to engage in such activities growing up. I thought about why my parents seemingly deprived my younger self of simple joys like pizza parties with my friends or watching TV and playing video games with my friends. I wondered as to what the goal was for me to learn Korean and all of these music instruments instead of having fun.

If I'm a kid, shouldn't I be having fun? Am I not deserving of a little rest?

In high school, when I no longer had enough time to participate in all of the music/language lessons, I sat down with my parents and asked very candidly why they made my sister and I do all of those activities. They were solemn in expression as they explained themselves. While they were growing up, these activities were things that their parents couldn't afford for them. Especially during the Korean War and living in rural communities, their parents' sole focus was putting food on the table and keeping a roof over their heads. Every single dollar and cent that their parents had earned was used for necessities, and it would seem selfish to ask for music or English lessons. To ask for money to participate in these activities would directly take money away dedicated to other aspects of their life. My parents wanted us to do these activities because they were also robbed of these joys in their childhood.

Now that I'm in college, I have a newfound understanding of my parents. One could say that they were trying to live their lives through their children, and it was selfish of them to do so. I don't see it that way though: I see it as my parents working hard so that my sister and I could have the childhood that they never had.